Friday, May 30, 2008

I love looking at me through your eyes they gaze so softly upon me,
I see the laughter and wonder.

I love the way they touch my soul and show me the beauty inside.
How wonderful the gift of their reflection.

It seems so real, I will believe that it is pure love I see.

Could it be that I have finally opened my heart to me?

- Heidi S

If I weren't afraid cont....

So....After my brave statement of "watch out world" gave me a reality check and said: honey you're not done yet!

On a car drive to an appointment this morning, my neck felt stiff and I chose to let go of what was creating that whilst listening to some pleasant music on the radio...the tears started to flow and I discovered that my choice of opening my heart was continuing it's integration and merely making a choice (really making a choice from deep inside) was enough!

And when the choice needs a little assistance I am not opposed to using the tools the universe provides like sound therapy and focused energy. Another welcome release insued bringing with it a flood gate of realizations. One at a time.

If I weren't afraid I would focus my business on energy and emotional balancing.

And here we go again another opportunity to put my money where my mouth is and face the fear and act asif.

I love the simplicity of doing internal emotional cleansing - reprogramming and watching the miracles happen. If I were not witnessing them in my own life I would probably be sceptical but my life has made a believer out of me.........IT IS flows where attention goes!!

I am so ready to live the life I was born to live.

Are you?

Thursday, May 29, 2008

If you weren't afraid what would you do?

I was lead through an exercise tonight at my monthly Loadstone networking meeting (check out the website for Loadstone to introduce yourself to a strong group of talented, gifted healthcare providers)

Anyway, we were asked "what would you do if you weren't afraid?"

As you can imagine all the obvious surface answers showed up first....I would sing out loud and dance in the rain and jump out of a perfectly good plane!

But when you dig a little deeper the fears that are blocking you from living the life you desire show their face.

I was amazed at the things that showed up for me. I realised that I would really open my heart and love without abandon. I would share that love with all and finally love myself the way I deserve. Oh no another biggy (the deserving factor)

I knew I hit the nail on the head when these words made me choke up. Isn't it funny that expressing the deep truth has a tendency to do make us all emotional and we find it hard to spit the words out. There is nothing like a bit of honesty with self to open a whole new world.

Many realized that they would choose different relationships and do a lot of things differently and I have made a note to myself not to wait - to start doing it all now!!!

Why let fear (an illusion) stop me from being all that I can be.

So here I out world I'm gonna love you next!!!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Don't play small

There are many authors we love and their words guide us at times. I love many of them but this one passage always stands out for me and as a South African citizen it has special meaning to me.

I use it as one of my rules to live by:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, "who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?" Actually who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your Playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to manifest the glory that is within us. And as we let our light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

- Marianne Williamson

(Nelson Mandela used this passage in his 1994 Inaugural Speech)

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Love after love

I really liked and identified with this poem, especially now and I wish to share it. It reminds me yet again that love starts on the inside first and it has become abundantly clear to me that I may have closed my heart little by little as I progressed through life. I bought into all the things I was told as a child and one of them was that I was unwanted and I somehow translated that into not lovable or loved and this became my reality and my inner dialogue became a reflection of that lie. This poem is a gift to myself and I give it now to you with an open heart and love as my motivation.....may this touch you deep inside as it does me.

The time will come

when, with elation,

you will greet yourself arriving

at your own door, in your own mirror,

and each will smile at the other's welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.

You will love again the stranger who was your self.

Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart

to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored

for another, who knows you by heart.

Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photograph, the desperate notes,

peel your own image from the mirror.

Sit. Feast on your life.

- Derek Wallcott

Monday, May 26, 2008

Believe in nothing..

Belief is the foundation for all our re-actions. (the way we act and keep acting)
It is where our feelings stem from.
In this new world of attraction, that we are all becoming more and more aware of, it seems strange that we still attract unwanted things.
Could this be that our beliefs are no longer true for us at this moment of creation, thus soliciting the incorrect feeling? And is it not this feeling that brings forth our manifestation? OR could it be that our beliefs solicit old feelings (not good uplifting...feelings) and then we manifest the things that are unwanted, in harmony with our feelings?

When I look at this statement it may mean that I am continually dancing around in a circle or that I must be present so that I can know what I am feeling and thus creating.

A lot of our belief systems were created at a very young age and we stubbornly hold unto them without really checking in. By that I mean checking into how they make us feel. This is the true guage of whether a belief system still serves us or not...

bringing me the point of...believe in nothing or even better yet be open to another belief system or a changing belief system. To create a different reality means that you must change the belief that created it in the first place.
When in doubt... Check in, how does it feel?

I am sorry if this seems garbled but sometimes we just puke on a page! Good luck figuring it out!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

positive exercises

I meet with an amazing group of women every month and we are currently reading A New Earth and one of our ladies mentioned a wonderful exercise that she is doing to help her initial perception of those she encounters in her daily life. She decided her first thought had to be something positive of every person that she sees in Target and has found this to be challenging at times. I salute her in her efforts to improve her positive energies and thus empower herself and send powerful positive energy to those around her.

I would like to go a little deeper and put the challenge out there to all of us to do this with ourselves....every time you look in the mirror, let the first thought and words that leave your mouth be something positive to the reflection you see. If you do this all the time it will be a lot easier to see the positive not only in others but in everything.

Criticism starts at home and the only way to be successful in eradicating it would be to start with self yet again....

This is my constant message to myself and those whose lives I touch...............Please look within before looking without!


"We are all flowers in the Great Spirit's garden. We share a common root, and the root is Mother Earth.

The garden is beautiful because it has different colors in it..and those colors represent different traditions and cultural backgrounds."

(Grandfather David Monongye)

We need to start looking at our world through new eyes. Believe in nothing but remain open to everything. Read the words but listen to your heart.
We live in an everchanging cosmos and therefore must remain open.
Freedom......being open to the opportunities that come our way. Ride the wave and see where it takes you.

Vaccines....causing autism???

Here is a recent article published inmedical news today......for those who still have doubts that vaccines are one of the leading causes of neurological regression leading certain kids to manifest autism.....................

"A primate model for autism using the U.S. children's immunization schedule was unveiled at the International Meeting For Autism Research (IMFAR) this weekend. The research underscores the critical need for studies into vaccine safety and the immune and mitochondrial dysfunction of autistic children. The National Autism Association (NAA) questions why the government hasn't undertaken these vital studies and why researchers have had to depend on private money to perform this critical science that will surely impact the health of millions of children worldwide.Using infant macaque monkeys, University of Pittsburgh's Dr. Laura Hewitson, Ph.D., described how vaccinated animals, when compared to unvaccinated animals, showed significant neurodevelopmental deficits and "significant associations between specific aberrant social and non-social behaviors, isotope binding, and vaccine exposure."Researchers also reported, "vaccinated animals exhibited progressively severe chronic active inflammation whereas unexposed animals did not" and found "many significant differences in the GI tissue gene expression profiles between vaccinated and unvaccinated animals." Gastrointestinal issues are a common symptom of children with regressive autism.NAA calls for the NIH to conduct large scale, non-epidemiological studies into the biomedical symptoms surrounding young children and all vaccines, including those containing the mercury-based preservative thimerosal and other additives like aluminum.This request for further research echoes that of Dr. Bernadine Healy, Former NIH Director in a CBS interview earlier this week. "I think public health officials have been too quick to dismiss the hypothesis as 'irrational,' without sufficient studies of causation...without studying the population that got sick," Healy said. "I have not seen major studies that focus on 300 kids who got autistic symptoms within a period of a few weeks of the vaccines."Recently the government's vaccine court conceded the case of Hannah Poling, admitting that vaccines triggered her regression into autism by exacerbating mitochondrial dysfunction. "The recent Poling case and this new research provide further evidence that the CDC has fallen down on their job to protect children from harm. The biomedical research to date suggests that parental reports of regression following vaccination is not only plausible, but likely in certain individuals," said Scott Bono, NAA Chairman. "To date, the CDC has conducted no safety testing on the possible harmful effects of simultaneously administering multiple vaccines to infants, and has steadfastly refused to state a preference for mercury-free vaccines to be given to children and pregnant women. It's time for HHS and Congress to step in and take vaccine safety away from the CDC."On June 4th, parents of vaccine-injured children will rally for toxin-free immunizations in Washington, DC. For more information about the "Green Our Vaccines" rally or the new primate study visit"

National Autism Association

Thursday, May 22, 2008


This seems to be the message for me lately....gratitude.
I love it as it does bring in more things to be grateful for via the law of attraction.
I am a great believer in whatever we put out there comes back to us ten fold and why not let it be gratitude.

Unfortunately not to many emphasise the fact that it has to start with you, about you!
There are so many things that I am grateful for about myself, now that I have had time to think about it, and it only makes sense that once we acknowledge that....then we can be given more and our gifts become manifest.

How many people can honestly say that they spend time appreciating themselves, yet they expect others to appreciate them. Everything starts on the inside first and you cannot attract what you are not already vibrating at.
I know this is a hard one to swallow for some but it is true, the good and the bad....if shitty things are happening to you what energy are you vibrating at or what are your predominant thoughts and feelings that may be attracting your current situation.

The point I am trying to get across and cement in my own mind grateful for who you are and what you have achieved and all the growth and changes you have encountered in your time here. Appreciate your uniqueness (is that even a word???), honor your journey and love yourself fully! Look in the mirror everyday and thank yourself for who you are and while you are there tell yourself how much you love you!!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Am I enough...?

There are times when I meet the most amazing, gifted people in the healing field and I am in awe of them. Unfortunately this time I am filled with feelings of inadequecy...

those same feelings of not being enough, not being good enough.

We spend so much time on self healing and letting go of the obstacles and old belief systems and those things that do not serve us yet as we look down, it's that same old stumbling block again.

I start thinking why am I in this business when there are so many people that are so much better at it than me, so much more gifted and why will I not give up?

I guess that would be the million dollar question...what keeps driving me, is it this searching of perfection for me, this thorn in my side? Should I then percieve it it a rose and not a thorn?

Maybe I should just stop thinking and go with the flow... maybe I am still to grow into a beautiful rose bush, thorns and all!!!

Sweet dreams....??

Why do you creep so silently...deep in the night,
so full of promise, so full of light

creeping deep into my heart.....

And when daylight comes you do not stay,
leaving me empty to face the day?

Monday, May 12, 2008

Naturopathic Bill

My time has been consumed with letters to Senators the last few days and somehow I did not fell like airing all my feelings but I guess I am ready to now.

There is a bill waiting on the senate floor to be voted on that can change the lives of many practitioners...mine included. It is being voted on tomorow morning at 8:30am.
I wait with fingers crossed and many a prayer sent out to the void beyond hoping for the forces to greet it with open arms and send it back to me in just the right way.

There are 20 naturopathic physicians that are wanting to be regulated or lisenced and they believe that it will improve their lives and practice. all I can say is that it is a shame that egos tend to blind us. The only people this will benefit is the medical profession and some of the schools in Minnesota. There are only accredited schools outside of Minnesota currently and should this pass then Northwestern College of Chiropractic has a good chance of being able to open a Naturopathic program....convenient!!! This explains why their lobbyist are at the state Capitol too.

I entered into this profession to assist poeple in finding their way back to their health , naturally.
I did not know that all my years of study will be looked at as nothing. This is what is happening once this bill passes....I as a classical naturopath will no longer be able to use those credentials or practise any form of Naturopathy unless I go to an accredited school for 4 years of full time studying and I would need to close my office and start back again in four years, not to mention that the schools are all out of state and do not offer anything but full time study...GREAT!!!!!
My hope is that the Senators see that there are many practitioners out there that have a Classical naturopathic education and that all their rights are being stripped. Ironic that I am hoping for acknowledgement of rights when we are fighting a war and no one is paying attention to the rights of all those innocent people. (Another topic for another time)

Glad I got that out there...the wait and tension will be over tomorow morning.

I keep sending good energy to all involved trusting that whatever will be must be....

Trust, now that's a good topic for later.......

waging the battle of being in love as an unarmed entity

What is this strangeness that crawls over me....

A sensation so intriguing.

No comfort level yet no pain!

I may have been here before but the memory eludes me.

Is this the prize at the end of the fairytale, this feeling of embracing discomfort!?

Sunday, May 11, 2008


To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine . . and those who don't.

As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) - bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop. (that's over 2 pounds).

However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit .

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service .

This was an e-mail sent to me and I thought it was amusing and worth sharing.
Enjoy the weekend.