Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Stressed out....

Stressed out....who, me??

There are a few things in life that are considered to be the most stressful....a divorce, a death, moving, changing jobs, running your own business, getting married, having a baby to mention but a few.

I am experiencing most of the above and it amazes me how well we handle things and may even feel as if we do not have much stress. My hips and thighs are telling me different. The chemicals that stress has created in my body has caused chaos and I am having a hard time looking in the mirror.
Excess cortisol is not my friend at the moment and I have all these beautiful clothes that I can no longer fit into. I now recall another time of stress in my life and am starting to see a pattern. Whenever I experience stress, the excess cortisol settles on my butt and hips and I feel like a pear!
But I must ask if that is the only reason my body is behaving this way (natural to have more cortisol during stress) or am I sabotaging myself?? In this time of finding my own happiness I am once again faced with the question.....am I deserving of it?? This is not a conscious question until I stop and think or someone points out the obvious!

Either way, I have decided to exercise regularly again and to manage my time better and to ensure that I schedule enough time for me. It is a delicate balance because if I am not busy at work then I start panicking and forget that sometime that also indicates a need to slow down and take care of what is right in front of us. I am not sure where I am going with all of this or even if there is a point. But taking the time for me also means going deep inside and rectifying that old pattern of not being enough and not deserving joy, abundance and happiness.

I have heard and read that this is the month for clearing old stuff and I am getting rid of stuff alright. I am having dreams about things that happened years ago and guess that I am being given a chance to clear it, make peace with it or pay attention to the message of it.

Stressed or not I am going to take the time to look at all the unfinished business and get rid of it.
Afraid or not I am going deep within to heal myself because that is the only way to approach a new life and these wonderful times.

No comments: